On My Mom

If you read my origin story on my blog real-life-fantasy(dot)com, then you are probably aware that I had a mental breakdown when my mom ordered me to return to London when I just moved into my caravan at the gay/bi naturist campsite rosebay and my younger brother injured his knee. Her message that day had zero regard for my well-being and I was working 4 full-time remote software engineering jobs simultaneously. I had less than 8 hours of sleep in total for the 5 days prior.

For almost an entire year before that, she would ask me to have a video call with her on WeChat every other day if not every day. And she would ask me when I planned to go back to China in almost every single call we had. This was when I was working at least three full-time remote software engineer jobs at any given time, and looking after both of my younger siblings, being financially responsible and I was effectively their guardian and a full-time single parent.

Please let me remind everyone that I just turned 28 last month.

I realised she was causing me harm in the name of love yesterday after the things she called me as mentioned in recent posts. I blocked her on WeChat as a result because every message she sent me even without me replying is a knife in my heart. I would trade her love for His love any time any day.

What did I do so wrong in this life that I deserve to be treated like this by everyone?

Matthew 10:37-39

[37] Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. [38] And whoever does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. [39] Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.